Hello beautiful people!
Welcome back to MindTalks with Imma on everyeveryng.
T…T…T…TGIF!!! Thank God It’s Friday!
Today is Friday, the first Friday in the second month of the second half of the year. And God is good people; we are in the 8th month with four months left to the end of 2021.
Can you believe that? The year just started a while back, and we are already counting down to the end of the year. God has been faithful. We’ve been here, surviving; it hasn’t been easy, but we’ve been pushing it. So, hurray to us, we are winning.
In today’s episode, we will discuss the law of attraction, from a different perspective, though. How can you attract the people you need rather than the people you want.
You know, what we need in people is different from what we want from them. What you need generally completes you as a human being and makes you more functional and fulfilled, whereas what you want may not necessarily give you a happy ending but just temporary joy.
We must understand that need and want are two different things. What you want is dynamic and changes with time, environment and circumstances, but what you need doesn’t change. Instead, it forms a part of you and can only get better with time.
So that being said, now the question is, how do you attract the people you need more than the people you want? People always complain about how they attract the wrong people; you see people who say, ‘Oh, I attract only toxic men’, ‘Oh, I attract men who don’t care ( when told from a woman’s side in the relationship aspect).
But today’s episode is generally on the people in our lives, who we need and who we want, and questioning the reasons why some people “attract” persons not meant for them. But we have to understand that we attract everybody, we attract all kinds of people, but the problem is that we get to choose those not suitable for us. These are some ways we can attract the people we need rather than the people we want.
Rule number one is be the right person. At the end of every podcast, I always say, ‘in the world where you can be anything, please be kind’, and this is what we are doing for ourselves. ‘Cos all the time, people go out looking for kind people, checking if the people they’ve been in contact with are kind, whether they treated them well enough, and we forget that we can be the kind person.
What you are looking for in others, you can be it; that is where the phrase ‘be the change you want’ applies. So when you are looking to attract the right person, you have to, first of all, be the right person; you have to be that person you need.
In the law of attraction, we attract what we are; that is why like-minded individuals find ways to contact even in a large crowd. You are wondering, this person who is like this, how did they even mix up? There’s a particular way where it is effortless for you to link up to your kind of person. That kind of person who you needs to be with, you have to start first by being that person.
What you need to understand is that if you don’t be the right person or the person you need, there’s the tendency that it is going to be difficult for you to be able to recognise that person.
In other words, by being that person, you also have to understand your personality. Everybody’s personality is unique, so our taste in people is unique, and we tend to like people who behave in a particular kind of way.
Also, having a good grasp of your personality helps you build your personality traits and helps you differentiate the kind of people you need and the kind of people you want because your character understands. I want a talkative friend, I don’t mind, but I don’t need a chatty friend.
You probably need a friend who is discreet because you’re a private person. But someone who is not a private person, who is a social butterfly, it is not a big deal for them to have a friend who is talkative because that friend is always going to be there to sell your market, to blow the trumpet for you exactly how you want it.
But it’s different for someone who is a private person, and this is the importance of understanding your personality trait as it helps you know the kind of person you need and helps you attract the right kind of people. Because if you are a private person, it’s really difficult linking up with a talkative, unless it is someone you know from far back or something different linked you both together but not just randomly.
One strange thing, though, is that people who behave differently from us are gorgeous people who have good hearts and good intentions.
So yes, it also bores down to what you need in a person. When we meet different people, we want other things from them. So knowing what you need from a person at a particular point in time means that even their flaws cannot stop me from needing this person in my life.
So understanding your personality, understanding your personality traits and being the right person are the three things I’ve mentioned that would help you attract the people you need in your life.
Now, we have to look beyond physical and material things because those are what we want. Your mind tells you that you wish to them; they are important too, they make life easy, but the truth is that if you base your attraction solely on them, it won’t be sustainable for the long term.
If you keep building your rule of getting attracted to people based on what you see, the chances are slim that you are going to find a friend who is a long term kind of person because, at some point, it goes beyond the physical or material or fickle things you feel the person can bring to you. And it bores down to who the person is, the kind of heart they have, are they kind, do you feel they have peace in them?
Having material things and all the fine physical attributes is excellent; it makes life colourful, but then, it is what we want, not what we need. So, understanding your priority is essential in choosing who you need in your life.
Finally, the critical way is being the right person, but another important one is to believe that a reasonable person exists. Do you know that there are people who feel that good people don’t live?
For instance, in relationships, some people feel that the street is rough, everybody is crazy, they only want things for themselves, they are only selfish, they are only dubious, fake love. If you believe that everybody is affected, if you think that everybody is a liar, if you believe that everybody is selfish, how will you believe good people exist?
Cos, when you believe that good people exist that, is the only time when you can get good people. If you don’t think reasonable people exist, how will you contact good people because your mind is already conditioned to believe that there are no good people again?
You also have to understand that your heart and mind hear you even before you say anything, and they both work together to attract the things you believe in or the things it has conditioned itself around.
Take, for instance, before you write an exam, and tell yourself, ‘This exam will be very smooth, and I’m going to be successful. What will I be asked in this exam that I’ve not read’. So this optimism builds confidence even before you sit for the exam. But that exam you go for, and you are like, ‘This exam o!
Who knows how this exam is going to be?’ Your confidence level is down to minus already, and the only thing that will help you is only by a slim chance, something happens, and the exam turns out good. If not, you are going to come out and be like, ‘Oh! I said it ’.
But having this optimism is essential in dealing with human beings and living life generally. Understand the difference between being optimistic and having unrealistic standards because human beings are bound to err. So while you’re confident, it is essential to be realistic and give room for adjustments, unforeseen circumstances that are controllable.
Things might go south a little bit but, are they controllable? When you understand that this person/ people I’m dealing with are people I need in my life, not just people I want. If you have the mindset that there are no good people around or in relationships that there are no good people in the dating pool, that is what you have to change now.
Be the right person, understand your personality, understand your personality traits and have a positive mindset that good people exist. Voilà, you will attract the right people you need in your life.
So yes, dear, that would be all on today’s episode on the law of attraction. Would you please follow everyevery on all our social media platforms? We are available on Instagram at everyevery_ng, and on Twitter at everyevery_ng. Endeavour to like our Facebook page everyeveryng and subscribe to our YouTube channel and our blog everyeveryng.
Until next time guys, remember, in a world where you can be anything, please be kind.