Asari

I’m Asari (Episode 11): I Have Questions

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First of all, I’ll like to say that Tobe is a mad man, I just couldn’t believe him. Since the ground refused to open for me to enter; I decided to face him. I reprimanded him for behaving like a mad person and told him to leave but he kept asking me questions I didn’t want to answer in front of Max.

“So the next thing for you to do after we have a fight is to run into the arms of another man?”

I didn’t understand his question, I thought he was done with me; I didn’t know that we were fighting to make up later.

“I took you out and you kissed another man. Don’t I have the right to be upset about it?” he continued. By this time Max listened quietly, I looked at him a few times to see if he would help me dismiss Tobe but he didn’t flinch.

I told Tobe that he was being disrespectful for barging on us like that and washing our dirty linen in public

“Please leave!” I said through clenched teeth. I was so upset.

Read also: I’m Asari (Episode 10) A Kiss Changes Everything

He finally left, not without calling me a few choice words but I didn’t care at that moment; I was just very glad to see him turn his back to us with all his stupid questions.

“So this is a pattern with you” I looked at Max very well to be sure that he was the one who said that

“What is that supposed to mean?” I snapped

“Jumping from one guy to another. That’s why you don’t want to be with me because you want to be with multiple guys at the same time” I looked at him again, was this guy for real?

“Please. Do not fucking speak to me in that manner” I barked

“And don’t curse at me either, only guilty people curse. You know what? I thought there was something special between us, something that I have not had in a long time with anyone but from what I have seen, I am kidding myself. This is never going to work”, he said calmly, dropped cash on the table and disappeared.

I sat there thinking to myself ‘what just happened?’ Wait. Did I do something wrong? Is it that people don’t have a distinct conversation stating that things are now official? Or is it just me? Should I go about assuming that someone is my boyfriend even without talking to him about it? Why would Tobe just sit down and assume that I was his girlfriend? So many questions, nobody to answer.

I was very humiliated. I paid the waiter with the money that Max left and dragged myself home like a warrior coming back from a lost battle. On the ride back home I heard a female radio host say something that struck me. She said “if you have gone through a good number of relationships that didn’t work out, then the issue is with you because all your partners have one thing in common; you”

So, does that mean that I am the problem? I didn’t ask those guys to want me but they did and literally did not want to leave me alone. Every time I thought it was over, one of them would show up again with drama.

I won’t lie; I am very tired of the drama. Drama is emotionally draining and it’s starting to affect my sleep. So, I decided to let everything go. That is Max and Tobe. No matter what, even if they come back to me crying and begging I will never take any of them back; not after this humiliation.

I was up that night thinking about the words of the radio host; I chose not to agree with her statement. The reason it didn’t work out with any one of them is plain and simple. I didn’t truly like any of them enough to take it to the next level period. Plus their ego wouldn’t even allow me to date them and see which of them I really want to be with.

Ahn Ahn which kind of wahala is this? Am I not allowed to date different people and see which I prefer? Abi it’s because I am a woman that it’s a problem. I bet you that they both have other girls that they are talking to. They just couldn’t handle it coming from someone else. There are both good looking men so I am sure they are used to girls killing themselves and doing acrobatics to get their attention. Abeg let me leave all these my questions and let them have several seats.

It was 3:00 am and I still couldn’t sleep so I called my new friend Abdul.

“Hello” his voice was very groggy

“Awww, you picked your phone. I’m sorry for waking you up”, I said promising him that it was going to be a short phone call but it wasn’t. We ended up talking for like an hour. I gisted him everything that happened earlier and he laughed and laughed and laughed. It was refreshing talking to a guy who wasn’t trying to date me. I wasn’t used to it but I liked it.

“You should try to not date for a while and focus on something else, maybe your dream career or something”, he suggested after asking me questions about my goals in life and he was absolutely right

There was an audition in Lagos for a host for a new music video show. I love music, I love Lagos and I love the idea of being a host; so this was the perfect time for me to pursue something that I have always wanted. I don’t plan to die in my banking job.

“So while I am in Lagos hustling, what will you be doing with yourself?” I asked

“My girlfriend’s birthday is that weekend so I will be busy trying to throw her a surprise birthday party”, his words hit me like a stone in the wind. Abdul had a girlfriend ‘when…how… why’ I thought but I remained calm and aloof.

“Awwww that’s so nice of you” I forced myself to reply. We talked for another five minutes and the call ended. Right then, I knew that I was not going to sleep that night.

Abdul now had a girlfriend, since when? How did it happen? Did he really like her? Was he doing it to make me jealous? But he kissed me, why did he kiss me if he didn’t want me? Is she the reason he rejected me when I asked to hang out? Was there really a girlfriend? More questions and no one to answer.

I won’t even try to lie or deceive myself, the new development hurt me. Yes, Abdul having a girlfriend made me more jealous than the pit of hell is hot. I thought us being friends may lead to something … someday… maybe… I don’t know. But he has gone to get himself a girlfriend.

“Hmmmmmmmm” I sighed and looked at the time. It was time to get ready for work. Another day, another drama.

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