Egbon and Mazi

Pidgin News (63): Don’t Bank on a Trip to the Bank

Hello Egbon, good morning oh

Aah Mazi, how far now? This wan wey you dey call this early mur mur. Wetin happen?

Hmmm, if you no wetin happen to me this morning enh. I almost catch corona this morning o

Aaah corona keh. Wetin happen?

I say make I just rush go bank very early this morning so that I go do transfer but if you see wetin I take my eyes see. The kind people wey come back be like say dem dey share money for bank and you know the thing wey annoy me pass na that most people wey commot no even wear mask and dem no wan distance dem selves. Everybody wan gum body.

Ahn ahn Mazi, why you go go bank go do transfer? You no get mobile banking app for your phone?

I get but network the mess up these days and to do transfer with am dey hard

You never hear of USSD code? That *737?

I don hear of am but I no fit use that wan check my account balance now.

Who tell you that nonsense. Read the options well well you go see option for account balance. So you do the transfer wey you go do for bank?

Which transfer? I run commot oh. If corona go catch me no be for bank, make e come meet me for house abeg. You no even hear of one man wey even faint sef because en no fit breath well

I hear o and if that wan get corona now, na so en don share am for everybody wey commot go bank that dey.

Honestly, na em I call to tell you say make you no go anywhere near bank or even ATM machine because e be like say na there people go use share corona well well.

Na me you go tell that wan or na me suppose tell you? I no tell you say even though government don ease lock down; I no dey commot from my house go anywhere except market to buy food and that one sef na with plenty caution.

My brother, e be like say na your style I go start to dey do abeg. I see for news say corona patients for Gombe dey protest for their isolation centre.

Say wetin happen?

What else? E no go pass say dem no dey get good treatment or their isolation centre no dey comfortable for them. I see picture, dem even block highway o.

Ahn ahn, you sure say dem get corona? People wey no well dey get energy to stand for highway say dem wan protest?

If you ask me, who I go ask? You know your country; today na wan thing, tomorrow na another thing

Me sef I don tire. Different news everywhere and I no know the wan wey go fit trust. Even the deaths wey dey happen for kano state, minister of health don come talk say that there is no proof that na corona cause all those deaths.

If no be corona then wetin dey kill them like that because I know say e no be malaria; no be so malaria dey kill people like mosquito.

How dem go talk say na malaria when dem no dey craze. The truth go surely commot one day.

Yes o. truth go commot very soon. Make I go baff commot all these bank dirty from my body.

So you never baff and you dey call me? Abeg no give me any virus o

Mtshwww. Abeg commot there. Virus dey transfer through phone? If na like that everybody for this world for don catch corona since now.

I don hear. Dey go dey go

Okay o. na you go still take your hand take phone me later.


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