A toxic relationship is any relationship that is unfavorable to you or others. This type of relationship will drain you; physically, mentally & psychologically. Nevertheless, it may arise when two completely different people go into a relationship. When there is a gap in the ability to cohabit, communicate and live healthy, it leads to a lot of emotional turmoil i.e. arguments, fights, unnecessary drama.
The person being oppressed usually lives in constant unrest and denial about that relationship. When your relationship is bad there are certain signs, some are subtle while some just shamelessly slaps you right in the face.
How do you know its bad?
WHEN YOU FEEL UNEASE AROUND YOUR PARTNER
Your partner never gives room for you to be yourself. You’re always trying to put on a whole different personality just to please them even if it makes you uncomfortable. You shouldn’t always have to be on edge and uncomfortable around your partner because of fear of criticism or the fact that they may lash out at you.
Constant criticism could serve as a severe punch to the partner’s self esteem. Accept your partner for who they are, if they’re doing the wrong thing set the straight in a kind and nurturing instead of using passive aggression to drop hints.
EXCESSIVE FIGHTING
Too much bickering is another red flag to watch out for in toxic relationships. Fights, they say are necessary for couples to get familiar and to be able to tell apart what they like from what they don’t, but what happens when it becomes excessive.
When couples fight constantly often for no particular reason then there must be something wrong with the relationship. In a previous article (insert link of relationship and communication), I mentioned how communication is a major key in securing a long lasting relationship, if there is no understanding between both parties, then it certainly won’t work between the both of you.
BUYING YOUR WAY OUT
If your partner sees buying new shiny things for you just as a way of solving a problem on ground, then run….run I tell you! Instead of trying to hide a fault behind “a new pair of earrings” or “a vacation to Santorini” , a person should be able to own up to their mistakes, and one way someone corrects a mistake is to never repeat the act again.
This is a very unhealthy act because issues with a relationship are meant to be addressed accordingly. However, if your partner enjoys piling issues up, its eventually going to come back like a boomerang, usually worse than the last time. The only solution is to communicate with each other, never hesitate to find out where the relationship took a wrong turn and “send out a rescue team”.
HOW TO BREAK FREE
Breaking away from the shackles of any unhealthy relationship is never an easy task, in fact, many people aren’t even aware there is anything wrong with the relationship. The first step is to do a little soul searching and digging. Ask yourself about the real feelings towards your partner. Is the person manipulative?
If you’re able to to affirm that you’re not gaining anything thing rather than stress and unnecessary challenges from it, Its best to start taking measures to fix it. Talk about the problems with your partner and find long term solutions to living a healthy and better life. If the person isn’t willing to compromise, then its best to leave as soon as possible.