Nigerian media personality Toke Makinwa recently opened up about the red flags she would never ignore in a relationship, offering candid advice to women and men about behaviours that would end any potential connection. In an interview with Madame Joyce, Makinwa revealed the dealbreakers that would make a man “never hear from her again.”
During the interview, Makinwa shared her strong stance on several behaviours that signal unresolved issues and emotional baggage. One major red flag for her is when a man constantly talks negatively about his ex.
“If I meet a guy that runs his ex down, he’s never going to hear from me again. If I meet a guy who talks about his ex consistently, he’s still not over her, and he’s not going to hear from me,” Makinwa said, adding that anyone who makes constant comparisons to their past relationships is also a dealbreaker. “If I meet a guy who makes comparisons to where he’s coming from, he’s never going to hear from me.”
Makinwa, known for her bold and unapologetic views on relationships, also warned women about men who trash-talk their exes. She pointed out that these types of men often paint their past partners as “crazy,” which is a red flag in itself.
“Your vagina is not made of gold, what he did to his ex, he can do times two to you,” she advised, cautioning women not to be fooled by the story a man tells about his previous relationships. According to Makinwa, men who continuously criticize their exes are often the ones responsible for pushing their former partners to the edge.
She elaborated further, saying, “While you’re with him, it’s easy for a guy to paint a picture saying ‘she was crazy.’ Every girl is crazy in every guy’s book. If my exes talk about me to you, you’d think I’m the mad one because everyone would tell their own story. I always tell women that nigga going on about how crazy she is is the one that made her crazy.”
The conversation then shifted to the common tendency among women to think that certain behaviours will never happen to them. Madame Joyce brought up the idea of the “It can never be me” mentality that many people, especially women, have when it comes to judging others’ relationships.
Makinwa responded thoughtfully, explaining that life has a way of humbling even the most confident people. “I never say it can never be me because, at 6 pm that night, life can show you something different,” she said, emphasizing the unpredictability of life and the importance of not judging others. “I don’t judge people because I don’t understand your journey. I hear and I say, may God give us mercy because I’ve seen how people say it can never be me, and life would catch you at 6 pm that night. One thing I have learnt is that we’re the greatest judges when it comes to other people, but when it’s our turn, we make a case.”
Her words resonate with many who have seen how life can change in an instant, urging listeners to show more empathy and less judgment toward others.
Makinwa’s reflections on relationships serve as a reminder that emotional maturity, self-awareness, and the ability to recognize red flags are key components of building healthy partnerships. Her honest perspective offers valuable insights for anyone navigating the complexities of love and relationships.
