Having a crush on a colleague is not something to be ashamed of, even though it is frowned upon. When you spend more time with someone than you do with your family, it is difficult to avoid them.
I’ve worked in many places and have fully avoided falling for anyone. It was difficult though, to avoid this one person at a recent job. We spent a lot of time working together. I used that as a motivation to work and I felt it added drama to my life in some way.
How did I deal with it?
I did the worst thing. Told them about my crush and we ended up making out a few times and texting a lot. But that was it. I wanted more and they didn’t, so things became really awkward and affected my production rate. Ended up quitting the best job of my life so far, because the working atmosphere became unbearable.
How to properly deal with it
Get over the crush. Because of the unwanted outcome, it is only advisable to get over it and concentrate on your job. There are more instances where things don’t work out than there are that have worked. I have moved on and I have learned. Here’s how to get over your crush on a colleague.
Ask yourself why you like them
Are you just bored and don’t have a social life? I’ve found out that was the case for me because I am someone who is strict with my ‘type’. I tried to convince myself that I actually liked them, but I found out too late that I didn’t. Be honest with yourself.
Don’t spend time with them outside work
All of the texting and talking only made me want more from them. You should only spend time with them at work-related places until you have moved on. If like me, you have that crush out of boredom and the need for drama (most of which is in your head anyway), you should focus your energy on your hobbies and be involved in more activities. Anything that will distract you from thinking about them or contacting them.
Set boundaries for yourself
This is pretty difficult to achieve, especially if you spend time on activities such as eating together. Stop having lunch with them, stop obsessing over them, stop staring at them. Just stop. If it’s possible, give yourself more work than you would usually do. This way, you have less time to talk to or think about them.
Remember that there are consequences
I took the biggest risk is letting them know. I was so certain the feelings were mutual. You are at risk of losing your job, so make sure you’ll be doing it for something that’s worth it.
No pressure
Give yourself time. Having a crush is like having an addiction, so it wouldn’t just disappear after one day. You see them every day and it makes it even more difficult. Even if it takes months or years, it is going to happen. Just be patient.
It is not easy to cleanse yourself, but you’ll feel much better and have a healthier working environment. Do it!
