My hair experience is not very straightforward. From being asked, “why do you refer to your hair as natural, isn’t it just your hair?” Well, the background of the term ‘natural’ in reference to our hair stems from the fact that we used chemical products to straighten our hair. It’s basically when your hair is in the state that you were born with.
I joined the natural hair movement in 2012 after going through the phase of not liking my hair. It was not straight, long or soft enough. There were aunties, cousins, and friends who all had really long and straight, soft hair, so I always felt left out and wanted to apply relaxer on mine. My mother did not let me because I was still under the age of ten, except this one time when I was the flower girl for a family member’s wedding. My scalp got burned and I learned my lesson.
Fast forward to when I had to go to boarding school. It was an all girls catholic school, so we all had to cut our hair short. It became a ‘thing’ for us to apply relaxer on our hair after every term, because to us, that was what we considered beautiful. We actually used to make fun of the girls who didn’t. After secondary school, I was still relaxing my hair, but this time I had the liberty to use hair extensions. I always made sure I used really long, sleek extensions that permitted me to leave my hair out to cover the tracks and blend it. I hid my real hair from everyone, including my boyfriend.
It was tiring and I needed alternatives. I started seeing a lot of girls on Instagram embracing their natural hair. Even with that, it still wasn’t something I was interested in until I saw my sister’s. Hers was a very full and puffy afro. It was just very beautiful. I thought to myself, “she’s my sister; if her hair can look this beautiful, so can mine.” So I ran to the barbing salon to get rid of my relaxed hair. I got stared at a lot, but I embraced it and even added color. With time, as the natural hair movement in Nigeria grew, I became more involved. My hair was beautiful and it felt good to feel beautiful in something that wasn’t bought.
So I know some people say we can use only water, conditioner, and oil to take care of our hair. That isn’t the case for mine, because it took a lot of products to tame mine. Now, these products are not cheap and I found myself spending a lot of money. Soon, I became frustrated. So I decided to cut my hair again this year. Before I cut it, I relaxed it “just to see how it looks” and it was lovely. Just not as lovely as it was when it was natural. I haven’t decided on the next step I will take, but for now I’m either rocking my twa or my wigs.
My one take from experiencing my hair is this. It doesn’t matter if you’re natural or relaxed, your hair products will be costly and it’s just something you must deal with. Also, some people have ‘good hair’ in their DNA and you cannot force your hair into looking the way you want. Embrace your hair in whichever form it’s in. It is beautiful.