Egbon and Mazi

Egbon Jimoh (Episode 22): Akara for Votes

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Egbon, please enh did you watch the Nigerian match? I mean, the one with Benin?

Do you need to ask me? Abi you should be asking me if I was able to differentiate between that match and Atlanta 1996. You no see as the match come dey look like old match? The picture quality was very poor

Omo menh, as I look am, I confuse. You know how many times I change channel? Even as I dey watch am, my wife enter ask why I dey watch old match when Nigeria dey play Benin. I just point TV make she read wetin dem write for screen

You hear wetin commentator talk? Say na ‘Super Eagles 2, Nigeria 1’

I hear o. you see enh, Super Eagles win that match but Nigeria lose am because we just show the world say common live football match, our national station no fit air am. All these South African stations don see us finish

Na talk you talk! Dem don see say without dem ehn, we no go fit watch anything sensible. Haha, wetin I no go see for this life

Wetin?

Come see, Dino Melaye the use akara  bribe voters for Kogi state

Haha, nawa o. So if I no wan vote for am before, na akara go change my mind? En head no correct.

At all at all. But you see enh, some people go still sell their vote for that akara oo. Hunger dey this country. Forget say you don chop, some people never see food chop for three days

Na true you talk but even though. Can’t Nigerians learn integrity? Must we always be in survival mood? We no fit for once go hungry for something that we believe in?

Mazi, you wey dey talk, how many times you don let hunger catch you for a better cause?

Na me dem wan bribe with akara?

Excuse

Abeg, no talk that one. No be excuse. All the times wey I go vote, I never collect anything to change my vote before so which one be dey one wey you dey talk. I am a proud Igbo man and I am happy to say that I have never collected bribe to vote for anyone in my life.

I don hear. Mazi, all these tankers wey dey fall almost every week, you sure say dem no dey push am on purpose?

Ahn ahn, another one don fall again?

For that Lagos-Abeokuta way oo. E no just fall, e also explode

Nawa ooo. Which kind life be this? Anyway, na Christmas period. Na this time all these nonsense the happen well well

See as you dey talk am as if na good thing

How you want make I talk am, make I cry? See me see fried yam

I no talk say make you cry but at least… as if you know get remorse

See Egbon, no make me vex commot this place oo. If e dey pain you like that you for go Lagos go give the people wey get the tanker their money

No be vexing matter now

Read also: Egbon Jimoh (Episode 21)

Na vexing matter, e be like say as I dey shine teeth you no like am. I go close am so that your own teeth go shine

No be like that Mazi. Na the vex make you troway newspaper?

Wetin concern you concern my newspaper. Make I come dey go

Sorry o