“The person who seeks all their applause from outside has their happiness in another’s keeping .” – Dale Carnegie
This article is a guidepost for everyone who wants to be happy and successful always.
How many people in this entire world really have the independence of mind to make decisions and choices, without overbearing influence from others and environment? Most people of the world aren’t that wise and neither are they courageous to say things and stand by them. Many of us expend tremendous energy merely to be observed, considered, esteemed, praised, beloved, and admired by our fellows.
Frankly speaking, this is a costly venture because a life spent trying to please people who are perhaps incapable of ever being pleased, or trying too hard to always be seen as doing “what’s expected of you,” is a sure road to a regretful existence.
If you know how quickly people forget you once you are dead, you will stop living to impress people and start living to please yourself. We live among things that are destined to perish. Think of yourself as dead. You have lived your life. Now take what’s left and live it properly. Or is it your reputation that’s bothering you?
But look at how soon we’re all forgotten. The abyss of endless time that swallows it all. The emptiness of those applauding hands. The people who praise us; how changeable they are, how irrational. And the tiny region it happens.
In reality, people love to talk. So don’t let it bother you. The greatest prison people live in, is the fear of what other people think. Be who you are. You don’t have to wait for other’s approval and their opinions. Don’t try to please anyone or win his acceptance! When you try to please everyone else, you lose your identity and you are no longer you! Be fearlessly authentic!
We can’t control what others think of us. They’re going to have their own opinions, thoughts and feelings about what we do, and we can’t stop them. So why focus so much time and energy on worrying about what they think and trying to change it, when you can focus on doing what you love, that fuels your passion and lights up your life?!
Life is too short to pay attention to the negative noise. Do what makes you happy and the good times will follow. Toxic habits, people and energy will always try to come back when you’re doing better. Stay focused. Don’t let the actions of others rock you. Stay focused, master your mood and manage your energy.
Let people misjudge you, you have nothing to prove. Focus on productivity not explain-tivity. Do what you love the most and do not put at heart the negative remarks you hear. Accept the constructive criticism but keep the negative out. Do not wail your heart with turmoils that will pass.
Face every challenge with courage and be the victor that you are. Live your life in your own unique way. Follow your own passion ― not your parents’, not your teachers’, not society’s ― yours. Remember that wherever your heart is, there you will find your treasure. Avoid being obsessed about others acceptance, limiting your potential to be unique, to be who we want to become.
Sincerely speaking, you don’t have to always follow in the footsteps of others. And most important, you should always remind yourself that you don’t have to do what everyone else is doing and have a responsibility to develop the talents you have been given. The worst thing you can ever do to yourself is comparing your journey with those around you! This will always and still is a gigantic setback in your life. We all have different journeys and purposes! Focus on road ahead and believe in yourself and show love to yourself.
A great way to show yourself self-love is to trust yourself and your instincts. You know what is best for you, and self-trust is a step to self-love. You have to trust yourself before you can trust others, so listen to your gut and trust how you feel. Do you forget that most people suffer some forms of insanity? And is this your life mission, then – to win the approval of lunatics?
Independent people don’t get their sense of pleasure and satisfaction from the opinions of others. This frees them up to follow their own internal compasses. They are aware of who they are and don’t pretend to be anything else. Their direction comes from within, from their own principles and values. They do what they believe to be the right thing, and they’re not influenced by the fact that somebody might not like it.
In addition, independent people don’t need resplendent, fancy stuff in order to feel good. It’s not that they think it’s wrong to go out and buy the latest and greatest items to show off their status; they just don’t need to do this to be happy. Their happiness comes from within, as well as from the simpler pleasures—such as friends, family, and a sense of purpose—that make life rich.
A hundred years from now when you are alone in your grave, no one will care how much money you had, what car you drove or what kind of house you lived in. The only thing that will matter then will be your good deeds.
Therefore, stop letting yourself be pulled in all directions. All disturbances arise solely from the opinions within us. Whenever anyone criticizes or wrongs you, remember that they are only doing or saying what they think is right. They cannot be guided by your views, only their own; so if their views are wrong, they are the ones who suffer insofar as they are misguided.
Independent people know who they are. They are confident enough to be comfortable in their own skin. They are solidly grounded in reality, and they’re really present in each moment because they’re not trying to discover someone else’s agenda or worrying about their own.
In conclusion, your needs matter. Don’t ignore them. Sometimes you have to do what’s best for you and your life, not what’s best for everyone else.